But....
You must refund my money! I have attended a lot of weddings. I am shocked and perplexed whenever someone tells me that he/she has never been to a wedding since they came to America donkey years ago. Each year, I attend at least three weddings. Attending weddings can be expensive, depending on who the couple is and your participation level in the wedding. Let me break it down. The boxes represent the cost.
| Category | Wedding outfit | Asoebi | Gift | Money to throw while they’re dancing | Misc. | Total |
| Going as part of the wedding party (bridesmaid/groomsman) |  | | | | | |
| Going as a family member | | | | | | |
| Going as a close friend | | | | | | |
| Going strictly as a guest | | | | | | |
| Going as a guest’s guest | | | | | | |
The problem is that the divorce/separation rate among Nigerians has been on a steady rise, and I take personal offense to it. Why? Because I spent my money to attend their wedding, damn it! I look left, right, and center, and people are getting divorced, separated, or being given eviction notices from their matrimonial homes.
Henceforth, I am stating publicly: If I attended your wedding and spent a dime for/at it, you may get divorced, but at the time of your divorce, I want a complete refund of all my money --- plus interest. Gbam! Let no one say I did not say it.
*** In other news, Verastically Speakin' Talk Radio would be making a bold come-back on Saturday, September 18th at its usual time (10am U.S. Eastern/ 3pm Nigerian Time). We'll be talking about the Single Married Man. Mustapha will be co-hosting. Set your reminder.
*** In other, other news, I saw the movie Piranha yesterday, and I am now a firm believer that there does exist something more ferocious than the fury of a woman scorned. The way that man's penis was chewed and spat out, Lorena Bobbitt was just an appetizer. The preview is below.
12 comments:
Hahahha, you just reminded me of that movie, lol...that man deserved what he got. And he was even crying about it when all his legs were gone too, lol. That movie was bloody sha, and there'll be a part 2.
As for divorce, you don talk am finish.
As per collecting your "investment" in their wedding back from a couple getting seperated or divorced, hmmmm...I concur!!!
lol
Babe u wnt kill me.
I am laughing so hard!
This post caught my attention and i was laughing so hard at the idea of asking for a return of your investment, that i felt compelled to respond.
It's a good idea o-maybe if 'investors'...ahem...'friends' who contribute to the wedding begin to demand for their money back/interest, the divorcing couple would have a re-think. Think how rich you would be after your 'investments' have been refunded. Lol
weddings are so not my thing jor.
id rather sleep than attend one, its just too 'thank-God-he-proposed-to-me'.
and your idea is fabulous!!
I've been to only two weddings in my entire life.
Ouch! I definitely will not be seeing Piranha.
Couple getting divorced. Hubby wants to stay married, wife wants out. You gave them a crockery set. Wife gives back saucers and bowls. Hubby retains teacups and plates, the divorce was her choice not his. Why should he lose out? Second couple, you gave bed linen. Hubby returns pillowcases, wife keeps the sheets, after all, divorce was HIS idea. And so on. Piranha. Was he swimming in the buff? Did the aforementioned part get detached before or after the legs? And why was it spat out? Your post has raised so many intriguing questions, off I go to ponder. Lol.
Silly Spring break kids...next time they will heed the emergency. See the way a piranha ate that girl's bom bom.
@ this post, smh. The throwing money on the couple when they're dancing and the buying gifts from registry are huge sacrifices. Asoebi is not compulsory. BTW, this does not apply to me cos we're still awaiting our registry gift from YOU. Lol.
Last year, i almost broke my bank account cos of asoebi payments.These days, i just ask for the colour theme from my not so close friends and i wear what i have in that colour. I cannot shout
OMG..that preview was wicked! I watched it without sound and it was incredible still. damn.
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