Borin' Ol' Day

Today was one of those days that was just lived. I woke up this morning and nothing different happened. It was just a regular day for me; I did all the regular things I usually do. Oh, remember the Yoruba guy that asked me out on saturday? Well, get this.... he's married! Yeap! Can you believe his nerves? Oooh! He should thank his lucky stars that I didn't give him my numbers cause if I had, hell woulda had to freeze over before he smiles again. Wat is wrong with these men? You see, this is one big problem I have with our Naija men: their inability to keep their stuff in their pants. Why would a married man be asking for my number? That's not right at all. I bet his innocent wife is somewhere declaring her eternal love for husband, while he's @ a party tryna get numbers. No be fine him fine sef. Ah! Anyhow sha, I'm getting my butt to bed right now. I will tell you more bout my life tomorrow. Have a good nite sleep. Sweet dreams diary. I'm out.

Crazy Friendz

You would not believe what Uju made me do today! Believe it or not but she actually called me and made me deliver the craziest message. I felt so stupid just delievering the message sef. Lemme tell you what my dear Uju did. Remember how I said she went for a party and gave some fine Igbo guy her number? Well, her stupid self realized what she did and deleted his number from her phone. How UNsmart! The problem was that he already had her number anyways. This evening foine-Igbo-guy called her while she was talking to her bf. On seeing the number, she immediately assumed it was some other guy who had been stressin her life back in the day, so she figures it's time 4 "bf-threat!". That is, she told her bf about the other guy so that he could handle the situation in a manly manner (if there is such a thing). The problem is that it wasn't the other guy who called; it was foine-Igbo-guy who called. Her yeye self later found out and told her bf not to call him anymore because she just realised it was someone else. When asked who it was, she said "some guy that wanted Vera to have his number yesterday but Vera's fone wasn't working so Vera stored it on my phone. The boy was just calling to ask of Vera." Arrrggghhhh!!!!!!! You know what this makes me? An accomplice. Yeap! To a bad bad thing. But wait it gets worse, she then called me and told me to call foine-igbo-guy and say "Uju said I should tell you that her bf may call you, and if he does, you should tell him that you were trying to reach Vera on my fone. And don't call me again so I don't get in trouble." Ok, does any1 else think this is completely crazy? Anywayz, I called the guy and of course I had to repeat myself several times because he kept saying "what? huh?". 20 minutes after I delivered the message, she called me back and said "never mind, don't tell him about my bf, but tell him not 2 call me." Arrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is not happening! Of course, I told her she had lost her damn mind! Mehhhnnn, the things I go thru with my friends. A few minutes ago, I called Funmie to tell her about something that was bothering me and guess what she did? She fell asleep & started snoring. I've got a lot of stories to tell my children when they grow up... or should I say when they are born... or should I say when they are conceived.... or should I say when I @ least get married. Well, you get my point... I hope. Gnite dear diary. I'll be back 2morrow 4 more.

Freaky Baby Shower

Since it's past 12am, I guess what I'm about to write is about yesterday (saturday) but it feels like it's still yesterday cause I have not slept though it's already tomorrow or 2day rather (sunday). Anywayz, my really good friend, Funmie planned a surprise baby shower for a friend's girlfriend. Due 2 my sense of creativity (blushing right now), I was assigned 2 take care of the games. I did a wonderful job, if I have 2 say so myself. Every1 had fun; we all enjoyed the party. I believe the whole thing was over @ about 9pm, after which I was ready 2 get my butt home, but I was immediately queried.
My friend (the father-to-be) said "Vera, why are you leaving so soon? The party is just starting."
Of course I was dumbfounded cause I thought the party was over. Apparently there was an after party. Until today (or yesterday), I had never heard of a baby-shower after party. In about 30 mins time, people were trooping in from left & right. The baby shower that was originally almost all women became rapidly filled with men. I was not ready 2 party; I was not dressed up for a party. I mean, I could pass for going for a party, but then I was wearing repeat-clothes. That is one cardinal rule of parties... u do not under any circumstance repeat clothes. Damn! I was screwed. I stayed for two more hours and I have to admit that was the freakiest baby shower I had ever attended; fun, but freaky. I danced... mostly by myself because lately I have not been in the mood 2 dance with any1. We danced to a lil bit of everything.... Lagbaja, Sean Paul, D4L (Laffy Taffy), P-Square, Wyclef (Your Love), 50 Cent (Just a Lil Bit), 2Face, and a host of others. The DJ did a wonderful job. I even danced to a nasty Yoruba song. Apparently, the guy in the song was saying "I will eat it if it's clean"... oh well! Too late now! That's what I get for not being able 2 speak Yoruba & yet have a majority of Yoruba friends. Needless 2 say, the song was fast paced and I loved its beat. At about 11pm, Uju and I were ready to get to steppin'. As soon as we gat in2 the car, two guys followed. It was like a planned act. One of them went to Uju @ the driver's side. It was good for her, I guess since he was Igbo and she had told me earlier that he was fine. The Yoruba one came to my side and said
"Hi, I'm [witheld] and you are...?"
I said, "Vera" as I shook his aggressively approaching hand.
He said, "You know you are looking very beautiful." (Please! Like that line still works!).
So I (in my infinite composure) said, "Thanx. You don't look bad yourself"
He then took it a step further and said "So Vera, can I have your number? I would really love to get to know a beautiful girl like you" (Please! You gotta be kidding me!)
I said to him firmly, "No, I'm sorry I can't."
"Why not?" He inquired.
"I'm in a committed relationship and I don't wanna cause any friction."
He then said what I was thinking he would say, "I just want us to be friends." (Brotha please! You must think I was born yesterday).

....meanwhile, Uju & foine-Igbo-boy were exchanging numbers. Uju had finished giving him the digits before she said, "Oh! And I have a boyfriend" (which she just remember because she heard me saying I was in a committed relationship) Now, that was funny. Foine-Igbo-boy didn't believe her of course; he thought she was lying. Yoruba-boy-at-my-side thought that maybe I was lying too. I told him I wasn't. Needless to say, "I have a boyfriend" and "I'm in a committed relationship" will alwayz be the slogan regardless of my marital status. Finally Yoruba-boy-at-my-side gave up and left...reluctantly.

As soon as foine-Igbo-boy left Uju's side, she regretted giving him her number. She said "why? Vera why? Why did I give him my number now? Oh God, I will be in so much trouble. He (her boyfriend) will find out and kill me. Oh God, what will I say?" As a good friend, I said "I don't know! Don't ask me. Tell him anything as long as my name is not mentioned in it. As far as I'm concerned, I was not here when this transaction took place."

Why do we women do the things we do? We know it's wrong, but we still do it. A few months ago, I made the same mistake Uju just made. I don't know why I did it. I knew it was wrong, but I still did it. I had no intention of calling him, but I still did it. When he called me, I told him I'll call him back and from then on, I just screened his calls. Was that really necessary? I coulda just said "no, I'm in a committed relationship", but my dumb self had to give him my number. Mm mm mm. Not anymore. I refuse to be caught in the same web twice. It goes without saying that giving him my number put me in a lotta trouble, so I have since learnt my lesson.

For one thing, men never 'just want to be friends'. I mean, sometimes they do, but if they are coming up to you and asking for your number (especially at a party after they have seen you shake what your mama gave you), then they are definitely not looking to be 'just friends'. Lesson learnt: men are dogs........ led on by bitches (us).

Good nite, diary. I'm exhausted.

2Face my boo

Today, I went to see Big Momma's House II with my very close friend, Uju. I was really excited about it because I had seen the preview several times and knowing Martin Lawrence, I knew I would not be disappointed. Indeed, I wasn't. Anywayz, here's where 2Face comes in. We were watching the preview of a new movie called Phat Girls (due in February) & staring Monique. Next thing I heard playing was 2Face's African Queen! Oh my God! I was thrilled. Uju & I were squealing out of joy.... the only ones squealing, might I add. To every1 else, it was just a song (or maybe there were other Nigerians there, but they just didn't feel the need to be so hyper). Here's the link to watch the preview of the movie. I love 2Face; I think he is one of the most talented singers we have, and I am really happy that God has Blessed him so. Hearing 2Face's song in a yankee movie made me feel like no dream is too big to be dreamt. It made me believe that my dream of becoming a national best-selling author in america & beyond is definitely not too big 2 accomplish. It just gave me a very big boost of confidence (which @ this point is highly needed). Anywayz, 2 make the movie better, Monique's movie boyfriend's name is Tunde. Come on y'll, I have to agree with my Pastor, 2006 is definitely the year of the future. A better future 2 be more specific. Oh! And you know I'll definitely be going to see this movie. I might be back with more about my day.

True Confessions

• Lately, my mind has been preoccupied with owning a huge German Shepherd dog
• I hate school
• I need a job.... quick
• Right now, I am feeling extremely uncomfortable
• I don't understand some people; I just don't.
• I should be working on my book, but I don't feel up to it @ all
• I'm in a pissed-off mood.
• I need my father
• I feel compromised
• There's something wrong with us (women); we always want what we can't have (not that I can't have the German Sheperd dog; I can and I will... just a matter of time)
• Being appreciated is not a bad feeling @ all.
• I've been undermined and I feel somewhere between hurt and enraged, and I hate feeling this way. It's very bad 4 business. It's a contract waver, a deal breaker...and it's very punishable by the heart.
• Being undermined & demoralized over and over by someone you care about really takes a toll on one's emotions; mine, that is.
• I think I'm the new MizUnderstood. Maybe I have too many phonetics in my English or something (but I doubt it), cause somehow I say 'A' and people hear 'B'. I feel like I'm in Germany speaking Swahili with a Chinese accent.

Feelin a Bit Crappy

As much as I don't wanna be nasty, I can't help it, but I will try. So I woke up today to realize my monthly visitor was around....unexpectedly. Well, I knew from my calendar that she was scheduled to be here today, but she usually comes a day or two after the day I expect her to. So this time, I'm like "what da hell? She won't be here till tomorrow or next." Wrong! Soon as I realised what happened, I just said to myself, "what a day; what a damn day!". I am very irritable right now and will be irritable tomorrow too, but probably not next tomorrow (unless something else pisses me off), but I have been tryin' not to snap at any1 without any plausible reason. I'm supposed to be working on my book, but I am too pissed to do so. If I attempt doing so, I just might make my character bitchy (like I am feeling on the inside right now). I'm so pissed that I can't even think of anything I could do to make myself feel a lil' better. Usually, I'll be talkin' to some1, but today is not the day. The weather today was rather harsh.... wicked, might I add. When I went out, it only took a few minutes b4 it felt like my veins had frozen. Well, that's the highlight of my day. I live a pretty boring life.... don't you think? Mehn, I know I shouldn't be eating this late, but I am starvin like marvin right now. Wish I ate something earlier, but then I was too pissed to do so. Oh well, that beef noodle is looking mighty good right about now..... :)

Enter Vera

Today, I was goin thru a bunch of different emotions.... happy, sad, angry, hurt..... and I was really wishing I could write them down, but I was in no mood 2 write...with my hand, that is. So here I am welcoming myself into my blog. And b4 u get it twisted, lemme just say that I am not bipolar in any shape or form... neither do I have mood swings. I have never been and I'm not now on drugs and I am not on any meds either. Oh, and I'm neither goin thru withdrawal for alcohol nor nicotine. Ok, now that I've broken the ice (I hope), lemme go ahead and say that this is just me introducing and welcoming myself... wait, I said that already. Anywayz, I will be back @ a more appropriate time 2 continue writing