Soooo ... North Carolina {Pictures - Even Of Me - Included}

We finally managed to leave Baltimore at about 2pm. I won't even bother going into the details of what we went through. By the time we managed to get a rental car, grab breakfast brunch, and fight traffic, I was exhausted. Thankfully, Funmie was driving. We were supposed to get there at 8:30pm, but because of the traffic, we got there at 10:03pm. While Funmie drove, I kicked Mother Nature, Sleep in her breasts as I fought tooth and nail to stay awake and keep Funmie company. It was in the last 30 minutes of the journey that I gave up as Mother Nature's breasts were just too comfy.

Funmie's attempt at looking sad while we were waiting for out rental car

Funmie at the wedding ... looking gorgeous!

While I drove back to Baltimore, however, Funmie fell asleep 30 minutes into the journey and did not wake up till we got back home --- except when we stopped to refill our gas and when she woke up every now and then to give me a thumbs up or ask if I was okay. While she slept, I secretly took a picture of her with her mouth open, gum sitting on her tongue. Not sexy at all. This picture can kill a man's libido. If she does not buy me a pair of shoes, the picture goes up! You say blackmail. I say getting what I deserve. Semantics, really.

North Carolina was totally awesome! It was Aribaba's pleasure to have me and Funmie inconvenience him for an entire weekend. How often does that happen to him? It was our first road trip, so we were everything from excited to nervous to eager. We went for Chichi's wedding. You may not know her, of course, but she and her husband, Joe were one of the couples featured in this year's Show Me Your Love Valentine Blog Event - yes, right here on Verastic! 

You may kiss your bride ... mwah!

Funmie and Chichi

I don't know who was blushing more between this husband & wife

It was through the Show Me Your Love event that I knew Chichi. Prior to her sending her picture, we had never seen or spoken to each other. When it was time for her wedding, she requested my presence, and I was honored to be there. So, of course, I had to physically go to the table with Funmie and say, "Hi, my name is Vera Ezimora." The rest is history, I guess.  The wedding was so much fun! Aribaba and I did renditions of our fathers' dances. Too bad they were not there to see how much we have emulated them. Funmie concluded for the umpteenth time that she needs an Igbo husband. My fine Igbo men, where are you???

Show them what you got, Chichi!

The Funmie & Aribaba smiling competition

Needless to say, I was so proud of myself for driving all the way from Charlotte, North Carolina to Baltimore, Maryland (seven whole hours!) that I am now considering a major career change. It's about time I applied for a managerial position at Greyhound. Or Osondu as Mr. Shoes suggested. Either way, I will be cruising a luxurious bus near you. Don't suspend all your travel plans till further notice as Mr. Shoes said he would. Instead, trust me to deliver you safely --- hopefully. 

OMG! A picture of me! ***Now hyperventilating*** Someone, please call 911

DISCLAIMER: The fact that I attended Chichi's wedding in North Carolina should not give anyone the impetus to start inviting me everywhere!!! I've just always wanted to say impetus. But my point remains. Tehehe.

In A North Carolina State Of Mind

At some point today, Funmie and I will be travelling to North Carolina. We should have been on our way last night, but as whatever would have it, we are still here ... in Baltimore.  We've run into all sorts of complications from not having round trip tickets to not having enough money to not having enough proof of residence to rent a car (apparently, a license, car title, and car registration are all not enough proof). You name it, we don suffer am.

So, yes, we are now stuck here in Baltimore - on empty stomachs, by the way - wondering what to do next. We were hoping to be two hours into our trip by now, but see me see motorcycle, we are looking at the clock ticking by. By fire, by rain, we will get to North Carolina today.

My mom has been doing her job, of course, telling me, "You and Funmie better take public transport! Because the road to North Carolina is very, very narrow! Very, very narrow! You better take public transport oh! Hmmm!" I have wondered, of course, if the road to North Carolina becomes narrow from here (Baltimore) all the way to North Carolina, or if one little part is narrow. It doesn't really matter. As for this road trip, consider it done. We must do it.

I am not known for packing light, but for this trip, I have tried to respect myself by not packing as if I'm moving into Aribaba's house. Oh, did I mention I'll be staying with Aribaba? Yeah, so I have packed only one luggage (with the exception of my bag of shoes, my laptop bag, my camera bag, and my hand bag. Not bad, huh?). I only have two pairs of shoes (unlike the other times I've traveled with about five or six pairs of shoes for only about five days).  Funmie has six pairs of shoes, and yes, we're spending only two nights. Go figure. Gotta go now. Was hoping to put a picture up, but you don't want to know under which duress I am typing this post.

Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid (1)

This post is probably one of them.

You ever notice how people conveniently avoid the woman with the baby on the flight? You can't blame them really. What are the chances that the baby will not scream them to oblivion? It's not like they can yell at the baby. Well, they can --- but imagine who would be the bad guy after that. Besides, that would probably cause the baby to scream longer and louder.

I remember this flight I was on, and there was a woman, her baby, and another woman whom I assumed to be her mother. I sat next to them because that was the nearest open seat I found. I happen to be one of those people who avoid the baby-having passengers like a plague. When we were however-many-thousands of feet in the air, I decided to pull out that tiny little table - if you would call it that - attached to the back seat of the passenger in front of you. With my text book on it, I decided to tackle my 30-questions long assignment.

But this baby, this cute little blonde, blue-eyed baby ... it just could not resist the shine of my pencil. It kept pulling it away from me. I did not really mind. I was bothered by something else. I could not tell if this baby was a boy or a girl. Its ears were not pierced, so it was hard to tell. The style and colors of its clothes were unisex - a dull green color. Its hair was short, and it had not yet received its first hair cut - I was sure - so the style of its hair was misleading. Besides, I know how Black babies' hair can morph into a Punk-lookalike hair cut. If you did not know better, you'd swear the baby's mother was trying to make her child look like Bobby Brown - back when he was somebody. Or maybe that only happens to Nigerian babies. But I digress.

So this baby kept pulling my pencil. If I could steal it - yes, the baby, take it to the bathroom and open its diapers, I would have. I was so curious to know if it was a boy or a girl. Not knowing was terribly uncomfortable. It kept smiling at me. Its smile said nothing about its gender. I think it was probably because it did not have teeth. It was not the flirtatious smile of a boy baby to a female; neither was it the mischievous smile of a girl baby to a girl [sorry girls!]. I just had to know; if not for anything, I needed to stop the mental argument going on in my head where I referred to the baby as he, she, and it - all at once. No, calling it the baby just wouldn't do either. So why didn't I just ask? I don't know. I just could not bring myself to ask the question. How would I have asked?

• Is it a boy or a girl?
• He's a boy?
• What's her name?
• So uhm ... did you get its gender checked before you had it?
• May I see its birth certificate for a second?
• Do you mind if I borrow your baby for a minute? Just need to go to the bathroom and check something real quick.

D'oh! I just got an idea. I could have asked: So what's the baby's name? Well, too late now! I'll never find them again. But now that I think of it, the baby could have had a unisex name like Jamie or Chibuzo. Okay, fine. Maybe the chance of a White, blonde-haired, blue-eyed baby answering Chibuzo is slim, but it's not totally impossible.

Maybe I should not have blogged about my desire to take a woman's baby into the bathroom and expose its genitals. You think that might be sending the wrong message? Yeah, me too. The good news is that I am semi anonymous, and most of you don't know what I look like - hopefully. The bad news is that I am kidding myself and the TSA (Transportation Security Administration) peeps might start looking at me weird.

Yeap. Some things are definitely better left unsaid.

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Something that does need to be said, however, is the Annual Shiloh Festival at House of Praise Baltimore Church. It started yesterday, Nov. 8th, and it will end on Sunday Nov. 15th 2009. I was there yesterday [Apostle Sunny Aiyemo (from Nigeria) preached], and it was A-W-E-S-O-M-E - to say the least. If you're the Baltimore area, consider making a date with the LORD. I'll be doing the same for the days I can make it. The schedule is below.

Day	Date	Time	Pastor
Monday	Nov. 9th	7:00 pm	Apostle Sunny Aiyemo
Tuesday	Nov. 10th	7:00 pm	Apostle Sunny Aiyemo
Wednesday	Nov. 11th	7:00 pm	Apostle Sunny Aiyemo
Thursday	Nov. 12th	7:00 pm	Apostle Charles Ndifon
Friday	Nov. 13th	7:00 pm	Apostle Charles Ndifon
Saturday	Nov. 14th	7:00 pm	Rev. Sunday Akingbelure
Sunday	Nov. 15th	9:00 am & 11:00 am	Rev. Sunday Akingbelure

** Saturday's service is actually a praise event, so come there with your singing voice and your dancing shoes. And wear your African outfit, if you can.

** For Tuesday's service, Apostle Sunny Aiyemo has requested that you bring a bottle of water with you.

Contact info:

Address: 6101 Moravia Park Drive

Baltimore, MD, 21206.

Tel: 1.410.483.6101n OR 1.410.483.6107

E-mail: admin@houseofpraisebaltimore.org

Website: www.houseofpraisebaltimore.org