The one that goes off after my phone has rung and rung and a strange familiar voice has come up and said, "Please leave your message for four-four-three-nine-three-four-nine-three-zero-nine. Record your message after the tone..." A few more words, and then .... beep? Yes, that beep.
Well, here's a funny story about that beep. Apparently, it works. You see, when you call me and that voice picks up - instead of me - and instructs that you leave me a message after the beep, it may surprise you to know that that message actually comes to me. Ah, yes, at my quiet moment, I delight in pinning my earpiece into my innerear and hearing you loud and clear as if you're inside my head. No, really, I do.
But this can only happen when you actually leave me a message. And this brings me to my point. What is it about my dear, lovely Nigerian folks (especially the ones that reside in Nigeria) that make them (you) not want to leave messages? They (you) would really rather call me over. And over. And over. And over. Until I pick up. Or until I flush my phone down the toilet. Or hit it against the wall. Or throw it at the maid. Well, I don't have a maid. But still.
I do not deliberately miss people's calls --- except those people's calls that I do deliberately miss. But when I have a missed call from an unfamiliar number, I want more than anything to know who it is before I call back - no matter the caller's geographical location. So, please, dear caller(s), next time you call me and I don't pick up, leave me a message. Recite a poem, if you wish. Sing if you wanna. But leave a message that lets me know that a human being was on the other end of the line when my phone rang rang, and that said human being intentionally called me.
And on that note, for my darlings who live in Nigeria, *Insert serious Nigerian accent* I dey take God beg una, no dey call me at 10am your time. We are currently six hours apart. That makes it 4am my time. Sure, I'd love to be serenaded with your voice, but I'm not quite a morning person --- especially that type of morning.
